US residents can follow the link to contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline or call 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE).
Sacred is, what sacred does and what it does not do!
Sacred holds itself to the highest of standards, not allowing itself to be moved by the appearance of things, because, what one sees - is not always real or the truth.
The most sacred relationship God has created for mankind, beyond, but certainly inclusive of himself, is that of husband and wife. God's standards of sacredness for this relationship mirrors his divine appointment of Christ to the Church.
God has decreed that "[...] husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself" [Ephesians 5:28], however, men and women in Christian professing relationships are often living with a physically, mentally and/or sexually abusing spouse. This decay in the sanctity of marriage is, without a doubt, a major contributor to the social, moral and spiritual demise of mankind.
Many individuals, living under these conditions often (unwittingly) play a major role in the development and continuation of the ungodly treatment they are experiencing, and falsely believe they have little or no hope of escape.
So, what can be done about this epidemic that has forced itself into what is regarded by God as the most sacred of relationships? How can the cycle be broken and uprooted?
1. Confession...It's not only good for the Soul!
Battered/abused individuals must first, and foremost, acknowledge that they ARE, in a relationship that engages in the ungodly practice of abuse. Many victims fail to make this "confession" because of their fear of embarrassment, feelings of low self-worth and denial (even while they sit in the emergency room with broken bones).
Many of us were not taught nor have we experienced the true meaning of love. Making us vulnerable and eager to accept whatever appears to be freely given: money/tangible items, a mate that is present in body but not in mind, negative attention, and inappropriate affection. So how could we possibly know how to recognize and demonstrate LOVE? I'm glad you asked! Let the record show that LOVE is eloquently defined in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV):
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does
not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."
If and when you are in doubt about the status of your relationship, or you need to determine if there is a need for counseling, intervention, or separation, compare the "love" you are experiencing to the "Love" God desires for you.
2. Pray to the Father for deliverance, strength & guidance.
Psalm 20:6 states that "[...] the LORD saves His anointed; He will answer him from His Holy Heaven with the saving strength of His right hand."
I know, you're probably saying to yourself, "I'm not anointed, so this doesn't apply to me!" or "Anointed! Me! Yeah Right! How is that possible?" I assure you....YOU ARE ANOINTED!!!
The bible states that, as believers in Christ Jesus we have been established, anointed, sealed and given the Holy Spirit in our hearts.
"But," as LeVar Burton's motto, in one of my beloved childhood programs Reading Rainbow, said in each episode, "you don't have to take my word for it!"
Read 2 Corinthians 1:21 (NKJV) for yourself to find out the value God places on your life, body and soul:
Now He who establishes us with you in Christ and has anointed us is God."
3. Obtain help in the form of Godly counsel, physical protection and moral support.
God did not create us to be islands unto ourselves or to have all knowledge, wisdom or ability in ALL things. He gave each of us gifts, that we may work together, for and with each other as needed. The devil wants us to feel lonely, he needs us to doubt that we are worthy of love, attention, compassion and affection.
We often find it easier to keep our "mess" hidden, and consider ourselves experts at doing so, until we discover that our deepest secrets are interwoven in a mesh of controversy, rumors and even lies. We then wonder, "How did this happen?" There are two common reasons:
There are several important passages in the bible about this very thing:
Don't be too eager to accept the first words of advise you obtain, but develop a network of individuals you know to be trustworthy, honest, and have wisdom in the matter(s) you are bringing to them. It's not wise to expect a thief to guard your treasures.
According to Proverbs 11:14 "Where there is no counsel, the people fall; But in the multitude of counselors there is safety.
Our Father in heaven desires that we live a life, in which, we can feel safe from harm. He promises that, “For the oppression of the poor, for the sighing of the needy, now
I will arise,” says the LORD; “I will set him in the safety for which he yearns.” [Psalm 12:5]
4. We must ask God to forgive us for our role, if any, in this ungodly practice. We MUST Repent!!!
In God's Holy word [2 Chronicles 7:14] he states that "[...]if My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land."
We should rejoice in knowing that God is eager to shower us with his mercy. My sprit rejoices within me every time I read Psalm 86:5 "For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive, And abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You."
5. We MUST forgive our offender for their hurtful actions towards us, knowing that all judgment and vengeance belongs to the Lord.
Although this may be the most difficult thing to do, it is not impossible. God created us with the capacity to forgive. Forgiveness is a choice you make, but it is birth out of the LOVE you have for God and his creation.....mankind. There is no sin, crime or misfortune that can completely rob you of your divinely bestowed ability to Love, therefore you CAN NOT allow yourself to FALSELY believe that you do not have the capacity to forgive.
"Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord in Romans 12:19. This means that we are relieved of the burden to store up evil plots in our hearts to do harm to anyone in retribution for our sufferings. We are instead issued a warning that "[...] if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." [Matthew 6:14-15]
Think about it, the principle of forgiveness was so important that, Christ did not neglect to include it in the model prayer he provided to the disciples. We are to humbly ask God to "[...] forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors." (Matthew 6:12)
6. We must be willing to courageously allow the Holy Spirit to use our trials as a testimony to encourage others that security, peace and joy can be restored to them.
There is no better scripture to emphasize this point than
2 Timothy 1:7-9 which states, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, [...] but share with me in the sufferings for the gospel according to the power of God, who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began."
We are to use our difficulties, "sufferings," or shortcomings, as well as, the positive events in our lives as our testimony of God's power and love, as he works according to His purpose. In all things trust God, fore "He will not leave you, nor forsake you." (Deuteronomy 31:6)
Sacred holds itself to the highest of standards, not allowing itself to be moved by the appearance of things, because, what one sees - is not always real or the truth.
The most sacred relationship God has created for mankind, beyond, but certainly inclusive of himself, is that of husband and wife. God's standards of sacredness for this relationship mirrors his divine appointment of Christ to the Church.
God has decreed that "[...] husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself" [Ephesians 5:28], however, men and women in Christian professing relationships are often living with a physically, mentally and/or sexually abusing spouse. This decay in the sanctity of marriage is, without a doubt, a major contributor to the social, moral and spiritual demise of mankind.
Many individuals, living under these conditions often (unwittingly) play a major role in the development and continuation of the ungodly treatment they are experiencing, and falsely believe they have little or no hope of escape.
So, what can be done about this epidemic that has forced itself into what is regarded by God as the most sacred of relationships? How can the cycle be broken and uprooted?
1. Confession...It's not only good for the Soul!
Battered/abused individuals must first, and foremost, acknowledge that they ARE, in a relationship that engages in the ungodly practice of abuse. Many victims fail to make this "confession" because of their fear of embarrassment, feelings of low self-worth and denial (even while they sit in the emergency room with broken bones).
Many of us were not taught nor have we experienced the true meaning of love. Making us vulnerable and eager to accept whatever appears to be freely given: money/tangible items, a mate that is present in body but not in mind, negative attention, and inappropriate affection. So how could we possibly know how to recognize and demonstrate LOVE? I'm glad you asked! Let the record show that LOVE is eloquently defined in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV):
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does
not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails."
If and when you are in doubt about the status of your relationship, or you need to determine if there is a need for counseling, intervention, or separation, compare the "love" you are experiencing to the "Love" God desires for you.
2. Pray to the Father for deliverance, strength & guidance.
Psalm 20:6 states that "[...] the LORD saves His anointed; He will answer him from His Holy Heaven with the saving strength of His right hand."
I know, you're probably saying to yourself, "I'm not anointed, so this doesn't apply to me!" or "Anointed! Me! Yeah Right! How is that possible?" I assure you....YOU ARE ANOINTED!!!
The bible states that, as believers in Christ Jesus we have been established, anointed, sealed and given the Holy Spirit in our hearts.
"But," as LeVar Burton's motto, in one of my beloved childhood programs Reading Rainbow, said in each episode, "you don't have to take my word for it!"
Read 2 Corinthians 1:21 (NKJV) for yourself to find out the value God places on your life, body and soul:
Now He who establishes us with you in Christ and has anointed us is God."
3. Obtain help in the form of Godly counsel, physical protection and moral support.
God did not create us to be islands unto ourselves or to have all knowledge, wisdom or ability in ALL things. He gave each of us gifts, that we may work together, for and with each other as needed. The devil wants us to feel lonely, he needs us to doubt that we are worthy of love, attention, compassion and affection.
We often find it easier to keep our "mess" hidden, and consider ourselves experts at doing so, until we discover that our deepest secrets are interwoven in a mesh of controversy, rumors and even lies. We then wonder, "How did this happen?" There are two common reasons:
- While we are busy hiding from the truth, we are leaving it up to others to speculate and formulate their own conclusions.
- During a time of weakness/despair we sought out the counsel of someone not equipped with the gift of godly counsel and discretion.
There are several important passages in the bible about this very thing:
- Blessed is the man Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly [Psalm 1:1]
- [...] a man of understanding will attain wise counsel [Proverbs 1:5]
- The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, But he who heeds counsel is wise. [Proverbs 12:15]
- Listen to counsel and receive instruction, That you may be wise [...] [Proverbs 19:20]
Don't be too eager to accept the first words of advise you obtain, but develop a network of individuals you know to be trustworthy, honest, and have wisdom in the matter(s) you are bringing to them. It's not wise to expect a thief to guard your treasures.
According to Proverbs 11:14 "Where there is no counsel, the people fall; But in the multitude of counselors there is safety.
Our Father in heaven desires that we live a life, in which, we can feel safe from harm. He promises that, “For the oppression of the poor, for the sighing of the needy, now
I will arise,” says the LORD; “I will set him in the safety for which he yearns.” [Psalm 12:5]
4. We must ask God to forgive us for our role, if any, in this ungodly practice. We MUST Repent!!!
In God's Holy word [2 Chronicles 7:14] he states that "[...]if My people who are called by My name will humble themselves, and pray and seek My face, and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin and heal their land."
We should rejoice in knowing that God is eager to shower us with his mercy. My sprit rejoices within me every time I read Psalm 86:5 "For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive, And abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You."
5. We MUST forgive our offender for their hurtful actions towards us, knowing that all judgment and vengeance belongs to the Lord.
Although this may be the most difficult thing to do, it is not impossible. God created us with the capacity to forgive. Forgiveness is a choice you make, but it is birth out of the LOVE you have for God and his creation.....mankind. There is no sin, crime or misfortune that can completely rob you of your divinely bestowed ability to Love, therefore you CAN NOT allow yourself to FALSELY believe that you do not have the capacity to forgive.
"Vengeance is Mine, I will repay," says the Lord in Romans 12:19. This means that we are relieved of the burden to store up evil plots in our hearts to do harm to anyone in retribution for our sufferings. We are instead issued a warning that "[...] if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." [Matthew 6:14-15]
Think about it, the principle of forgiveness was so important that, Christ did not neglect to include it in the model prayer he provided to the disciples. We are to humbly ask God to "[...] forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors." (Matthew 6:12)
6. We must be willing to courageously allow the Holy Spirit to use our trials as a testimony to encourage others that security, peace and joy can be restored to them.
There is no better scripture to emphasize this point than
2 Timothy 1:7-9 which states, "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, [...] but share with me in the sufferings for the gospel according to the power of God, who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began."
We are to use our difficulties, "sufferings," or shortcomings, as well as, the positive events in our lives as our testimony of God's power and love, as he works according to His purpose. In all things trust God, fore "He will not leave you, nor forsake you." (Deuteronomy 31:6)
If you have a need or desire to have someone come in agreement with you in prayer for God to manifest himself in your life or the life of another, we are here to serve as an intercessor for and with you. We would like to lift your name up in prayer and email/mail you a copy of the personal prayer God's Holy Spirit has laid on our heart for you. Please complete and submit the prayer request form by following the link, with the details and specifics of your needs and we will obey and trust God for divine inspiration. Submit Your Prayer Request!